Opening a Dialogue: Bringing Up Assisted Living Options with a Loved One

While you may have tried to care for your loved one on your own, taking care of their needs can be a full-time job, and when it’s time to have the conversation, bringing up the topic can be the hardest thing you’ll do. Here are a few tips to help you start the conversation and begin the hunt for the right nursing home.

Express that You Care

What may seem to your loved one like an attempt to dump them in a facility is an expression of love and concern. You want your loved one to be comfortable, and opening the conversation with your concerns about their growing medical care needs can pave the way to a smooth dialogue. Express your concern for their wellbeing and their needs and discuss their growing care issues before mentioning an assisted living facility. Remember, for individuals who suffer from the early stages of diabetes, assisted living facilities may seem excessive. Be understanding and patient.

Let Them Yell

Your loved one will have concerns about the process, just as you do, and may be angry at first. If they yell at you or try to blame you for not caring, be understanding. Again, express that you care and that you’re concerned for their safety and wellbeing. You may not be equipped to give your loved one the care they need, particularly if they're suffering from Alzheimer's disease or progressive dementia. Be honest with them and tell them that you cannot provide for them as much as they require.

Nursing homes and assisted living facilities can be a home away from home. Most places have an extensive list of amenities to make your loved one’s life fun and enriched. Rather than dwelling on the life care services offered by a facility's on-site physician, focus on the activities your loved one can participate in. The decision to move your loved one into an assisted living facility is never easy. Be calm, patient, and understanding when you bring up the subject with your loved one.